Like Starting from the Finish Line
Have you ever felt like you're losing gravity? Like you can't stick to the ground and stand firm? Somethings are just not in place. It feels like falling, without gravity, you're falling up. And yes, I'm lost. I feel so off track.
It's been long since I've written anything on this dear blog. Inspite of all the busy-ness, I do not have much to write about. But no, I'm not tired of anything, yet. In fact I'm enjoying this point of the year... to be exact, this very point of my life.
I'm starting my senior year. Instead of thinking about how close separation and finals are, I consider this the start of the end.. which I still have a long way to go to pass the finish line. And during my run, I don't want to miss a single thing. I want to enjoy this last year of high school and finish it well along with the hard studies and concentration.
It's probably too early to talk about how I'm gonna miss things in my high school years. But I'm sure I am gonna miss everything. They were right, things just get better the further we go. Although the start seems to always give a little bit of doubt.
My elementary years, were awesome. Back then, I couldn't imagine a life better than what I'd had. But as I entered junior high (moved to a different school) I discovered that things do get better (although it was rough at first, adaptation = confusing and takes so long). The same goes for high school. I didn't think I'd get better friends than the ones I had had in junior high. But look at me now. There are actually people that I've known well for only 4 months that are now (i could say) my closest friends. I tell you, it feels like at least half a year that we've known each other. Dude I counted, I'm not mistaken.. solid friendship doesn't take that long to build up. That was just one cool thing I've discovered.
Lately, I've been afraid of the word "end". I've been into conversations about it so much; the end of anything, everything, different kinds of ends.When I get to that word I suddenly become afraid of reality. Anyway, what I'm saying is that I feel like things are just starting to get good, yet the end of it seems so near.
I wanna live in the clouds. Because sometimes I just can't face reality. Things get so unbelievable everytime I open my eyes, both good ways and bad. Sigh, Let's make a city in that cloudy skies, where it's easier to reach and pick up the stars at night.
Anyway this might've been totally random, I might just be typing myself to sleep with my current deep thoughts.
(Tomorrow I have to deal with numbers and formulas again.)